seek Me and live

Recently, I've been heavily examining my heart and the same lesson has been whispered softly into my heart, then blown loudly into my ears, and back to softly. He knows what it takes to get my attention ;). But that lesson has been that though He did intend on my season of heavy involvement in leadership and being a role model to other young women, that season is over and what is ahead of me is a season of heavy involvement in leading the hearts of two ladies in particular and being their role model. In this transition time, I've been quite confused and when trying to do both, I've lost patience and failed repeatedly, but that reason was also given to me: I can't do both. Not right now. A few writings from Oswald Chambers have struck my heart so powerfully that I've sat in shock, been taken aback, and re-surrendered to my calling. I'm daily poured out and exhausted for the sake of others, but I assure you, it's very very rarely a willing pouring or exhaustion.

It's so like God to give me a certain verse from one book at a time to show me one thing, and then a year later, give me another verse from a different book with the same topic to show me my next step. This time last year, when trying to decide how possible a busy life would even be with a new baby on the way and toddler, God drew me to Leviticus (yes, I'm Type A and find my well springs in books like Leviticus) to verse 5:11, "If, however, they cannot afford two doves or two young pigeons, they are to bring as an offering for their sin a tenth of an ephah of the finest flour for a sin offering. They must not put olive oil or incense on it, because it is a sin offering."

It had just been talking about offering a lamb or bull or other large and expensive animals, but then said this. And God spoke to my heart and acknowledged that in time and service, I would, indeed, have less to offer, but that in the end, it would be the same as those that had much to offer. Then, when I began to feel uncomfortable this last month or two, He drew me to several passages and most recently to Hosea 6. (Don't you just love Hosea?) In verse 6 from the New Living Translation, it says, "I want you to show love, not offer sacrifices. I want you to know Me, more than I want burnt offerings." sigh...I just love Him and how He knows just what to say :). I've been feeling like I've been offering up my children and their time while I serve others and not even making quality time with Him a priority and there, just as simple as that, He gives me my answer. There's nothing He doesn't know the answer to, and that, for this know it all girl, is such a refreshing and relieving thing. What can you take to Him? Through His word, you'll always always find what you're looking for. Amos 5:4 says, "This is what the Lord says to Israel, 'Seek me and live'" Live. Not drown. Not go crazy. Not hide in your room hoping when you come back out, things will magically be easier to deal with. Live.