A time for everything

Confession: I do not really like being a full time stay at home mom.

okay, okay, I know. your reaction was probably like, "gasp!!! but Heather! You craft!" I know. You would think the pre-school teacher turned mom would be right where she's comfortable, but I'm not. Not that I want some full time job that would keep me away from them all the time, but a few hours away a few days a week makes me a better mommy. I know that in this season of my life, my calling and job is to be home with them. Not that I don't enjoy it, by any means. I love it. I just sat at a little wooden princess table and had tea and coffee (water) with some dinner (oatmeal squares) while wearing crowns (I had to borrow Story's) and I wouldn't miss that for anything.

Throughout this time when things get stressful and crazy (basically since Story was born and slowing down now), I've spent a lot of time in Ecclesiastes. God has been showing me so many things and one of the most recent things has hit my heart so hard. Many people know the "a time for everything" part of this book, but I'll post it for anyone that's forgotten :)


There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace
Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8

I have read this over and over the last few months at times where I felt like I was failing my family by being so stressed that I actually wanted to just get away a bit. (it's just not a warm fuzzy feeling for a mom). For awhile, God assured me that this was a season and that soon, things would feel "normal" again and we'd be able to enjoy each other and love each other without the physical exhaustion and mental numbness you have with a newborn. However, I began looking to these verses incorrectly without even realizing it. Slowly, Satan whispered God's word just a tad twisted like he's done so many times before to me and others before me (Eve is a very good example if you're looking for one). I began looking at these verses like some sort of promise that though my life is crazy now, it won't be later. That some day, my kids will be in school, I'll sleep through the night, and have date nights with my husband. Sounds lovely from the outside, but I was wishing away my little girls' youth. A couple of nights ago, I was thinking of all the gifts left to buy for family members that you haven't the first guess of what to get and things of that nature when once again, this thought was blown into my head. God finally spoke firmly to my heart telling me that with this season of craziness that leaves, as will London's cute way of saying "yuv yooo mommy" and Story's look of confusion with new things all around and the big toothless open-mouthed grin when my face comes into view in the midst of it. This season is the season of babies and milestones and cuddles in my lap b/c they're still small enough to rock to sleep. The season that I feel like I have no time to do anything because London constantly wants my attention when, one day, I'll have to beg her to come tell me things about her life. The season where I feel like I'm so behind on laundry that I'll never catch up, but also the season of clean footie pj's on little feet. sigh...sometimes, I wonder why God doesn't just throw a lightening bolt and wake me up to the life going on around me. haha